


Destiny or Whatever

by Kaz323



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Friends to Lovers, Keith messes things up, M/M, Nonbinary Pidge | Katie Holt, background Shatt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-06
Updated: 2016-11-23
Packaged: 2018-08-29 09:29:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8484166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaz323/pseuds/Kaz323
Summary: AU where Keith knew Lance at the Garrison. They were friends, and everything was fine until Kerberos failed.





	1. Keith

_ How did I get here? _ Keith kept repeating this question inside of his head. Just before Shiro left for the last conference about the Kerberos mission, he had told him to do this. He wasn’t even forced into this situation, his own two feet had brought him here.

_ “I’ll be gone for two weeks this time. Then I’ll have one week back here.” Shiro said, looking out of Keith’s dorm window. _

_ “And then you’ll be gone,” he muttered, rubbing the back of his neck. He hadn’t noticed how long his hair had gotten in the back, for getting a mirror and cutting the back took too much effort. Honestly, he thought it looked okay anyways. _

_ “Just for three months.” Shiro had such an endearing smile, one that could be burned into people’s heads for hours on end. Still sensing Keith’s discomfort, he turned to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. “I promise I’ll be back.” _

_ Keith sighed, “I know you will.” _

_ He looked back out the window. It had been so peaceful that night, stars perfectly visable. “But in the meantime, I don’t want you to be alone.” _

_ “I’m fi-” _

_ He lifted a finger to interupt him. “Yes, I know you’re fine alone. A lone wolf, persay, but frankly, I don’t believe that.”  _

_ Keith’s scowl caused Shiro to shrug. _

_ “You may not need people all the time, but having no one to talk to for that long… Could be damaging.” His head tilted. “I really don’t want to come back to an insane brother.” He put his palms together. “God help me if I do.” _

_ Keith smirked. Shiro’s god jokes only went so far. _

_ “There are so many ways to find people, Keith. I mean, talk to people in your classes, go out to different coffee shops in the city,” though he didn’t mention the fact that the next city was over an hour away, “just sit in the cafeteria, someone ought to talk to you. There are clubs hosted in the Garrison.” _

_ “That sounds like a horrible idea.” _

_ “Keith.” _

_ His hands rose up in defense. “Fine. I’ll do it, but just for you. It doesn’t mean I’ll actually talk to anyone, though.” _

_ He rolled his eyes. “Thank you.” _

_ “Oh, yes, just rest easy tonight, Takashi.” _

 

Keith frowned at the memory. Why was it any of Shiro’s business anyways?  _ I could do just fine on my own. _ Three months really weren’t that long. Yet, it had been three days since he left, and it wasn’t even for Kerberos yet, and he  _ really  _ missed him. 

So, here he was, sitting in the cafeteria, listening to all the conversations going on around him, completely oblivious of his struggle. There wasn’t any interesting talks, which was truly a shame, for Keith wasn’t even getting quality entertainment out of this. People mostly just stayed on the topic of recent movies that came out and their classes. 

He was nearly done with his lunch, which was just a chili, with at least two week old ingredients, and a stale lemonade. It was hard to get supplies out in the center of a canyon. He took the last bite he was able to of his food, and finally looked up to see a large figure standing over him.

“Hey, Keith! Finally gotten out of your room, huh?” He had a long bandana tied just above his forehead, and perfect strands of black hair trailed up above the top on both sides of his face. 

He swallowed, “do I know you?”  _ Well that was blunt, great going Kogane. _

“Not really. I mean, I am in your Emergency Health class, but Lance is the one you’d recognize,” he pointed off to the corner, where there was a boy sitting on one of the high circular tables. 

“I don’t know him.”

The boy seemed to ignore that fact. “Anyways, I said I should invite you over to our table because you look so  _ alone _ . No one should be that alone during the great time of lunch!” He clapped his hands together with enthusiasm. “Lance disagreed and said-” He stopped mid sentence, thinking better of it. “But, yeah. Come sit with us!”

He was about to reject this invitation, but Shiro’s warm voice came back to him. The knowledge of not seeing him for a while changed his mind.  _ I’ll try, Shiro. _ He slowly nodded, and grabbed his drink and food. On the way, he tossed what was left of his chili in the trash. The boy gave him a disturbed look, but Keith chose to ignore it.

“I’m Hunk, by the way,” he said, grinning. 

He came up to the table, and introduced the other boy. Keith noted his perfect tan skin and dull blue eyes. “This is Lance.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Nice mullet.” Keith knew sarcasm most of the time, and Lance made it very clear.

“How long have you been holding that one in, genius?”

Lance licked his lips, “for the record, I  _ am  _ a genius!”

Hunk snorted.

“Why won’t you back me up?”

“Obvious reasons,” he replied simply, sitting down, and offering Keith a chair.

He reluctantly took it. He couldn’t help but feel out of place, completely alien to this.

 

~~~

 

So, that was how it started. Hunk had begun to invite him to things: movie nights, clubbing, and even baking nights, damn could those boys cook. Lance turned out to be quite adventurous. He was the one who was always planning things. Every other night, actually.  

About a week later, after Keith had noticed Lance was in around five of his classes for he was also a pilot, Lance came into his Flight History class, and sat next to him. Keith had sat in the south corner every day, close to the board, but far from the other people. Lance, sat in nearly the opposite direction. 

“What are you doing?” Keith asked. 

He looked over, sliding his stuff under the desk. “I can’t really make this class any worse by sitting next to you. So, I might as well.”

Keith maintained a monotone expression, but the warmth inside of him began to blossom, though during these classes, he found that Lance had a habit to flirt with other person in the room.

Later that night, he’d been inviting to dinner at their dorm. They had four other roommates, and a shared kitchen. Naturally, he had to convince himself to go, but he enjoyed it nonetheless.

They decided on a roasted ham, which they had to go into the city by bus to go and buy. Keith sat on the barstool, watching them both ready side dishes and such. Hunk finally looked over and said, “ah, sorry, but could you help measure the brown sugar?”

Of course he hesitated, he rarely cooked. Shiro always did the cooking in their two person family, and as horrible as he did it, Keith never had to complain for he had a full stomach. So, he didn’t know how. “Ah- I- I don’t-”

“Come ooooonnnnn,” Lance dragged out, leaning farther backwards than Keith thought possible. “You can help out with the meal we are so  _ graciously _ sharing with you.”

He swallowed, unable to say no. He stood, walking to the other side of the counter. He scooped some into a random cup and looked at Hunk for help, who was too busy dicing some tomatoes for a salad.

“What are you doing?” It was a short chuckle from Lance.

“I- Ah-” 

“Do you even  _ know _ ?”

He looked down, shaking his head.

Lance’s mischevious grin faltered for a small moment, almost as if it didn’t happen, but Keith saw. It was a short look of pity. “I- the master of cooking -must teach you, then.” He raised a hand to his chest pridefully.

“You’re hardly a master of anything.”

He looked over with a scowl. “Excuse you, I’m fabulous at  _ everything. _ ”

Hunk smiled, “good one, Lance.”

“Hunk, I love you, but you have to move aside on this meal. Keith has to be taught.”

“By you?”

Lance flushed. “ _ Yes _ by me. You’ll have to supervise.”

Keith cursed himself for getting himself sucked into this nonsense, but when he looked at Lance, he didn’t know why, he had to continue.

He pulled himself behind Keith, pulling a drawer out, revealing measuring cups. “Pick out a ⅓ cup.”

Keith picked one up.  “Okay, how do you know which one’s which?”

“Goodness, Keith, they’re written on the handles.”

He pulled one of them up closer to his face, and frowned. “Oh.”

Hunk sat down on the barstool at that point and decided to watch. Keith couldn’t help but wonder if having his own kitchen taken over bothered him.

“Now, find the ⅓ cup.”

When he finally did so, Lance pulled a spoon out of a drawer behind him, as well as a knife. “Use the spoon to pack it in.”

“And if I don’t want to?”

“Then you don’t get dinner.” He shrugged.

Hunk laughed, “your leadership skills are improving.”

Lance pointed finger guns at him.

Keith finally did as he was told, and the rest of the night went on. Lance was annoyingly bossy about the whole situation. When Keith finally called him out on it, he just said, “cooking isn’t free if you’re following a recipe, my friend.”

The word friend echoed within him, but Keith managed to keep his slight excitement on the down-low.

Eventually, they got the ham in the oven, but it took long enough to cause Hunk to fall asleep on the counter. Lance made a full smile at the sight of his arm tucked under his head.

“He’s much more tired than he likes to admit.” The fondness in his eyes was so unfamiliar to Keith. 

He watched as Lance pulled out a blanket from their closet and placed it on him. 

“How long have you known each other?”

He pulled his gaze back up. “Seems like forever, but only since we were like… Eight.”

He didn’t even know Shiro that long. He had been adopted into that family when he was ten. Their mother was always away on business. When he was fourteen, and Shiro was nineteen, she died. Keith felt more than guilty because Shiro shouldn’t have been forced to take care of him. He wasn’t a brother, they had only known each other four years. Though, if anything else, Shiro showed unimaginable love by taking over his role as guardian to Keith.

The silence between them lasted a long time, but Lance finally perked up saying, “have you ever been to the roof?”

“N-no.”

“It’s basically the coolest part of the building.” He basically dragged Keith to his feet. “Especially at this time of night. Hunk and I love to go there.” 

“We aren’t allowed-”

“Out of our dorms,” he scoffed, “I know, but honestly, no one monitors these buildings, so as long as we don’t leave it, we’ll be fine.”

That settled that. Not less than five minutes later, they ran up the stairs. “Come on! Are you always this slow?” Lance taunted.

“You’re the slow one!” He passed him on the way up, but just before he reached the door, Lance tore him back. 

“No you don’t!” 

It took them a while to get through that door amongst the wrestling, but it was friendly. Neither of them could hold back their laughing as they kept trying to pin one another to the ground.

When the door slid open, Lance looked up in awe. He had been on top for the second, but Keith easily took over after that. After a few moments, he looked up to where he was staring, and Keith couldn’t deny the perfect sight.

Lance had been right, it was the coolest part of the building. The sky had been beautiful out of Keith’s window, but it covered everything. The boys untangled themselves and exited the stairwell.

Lance went to the edge right away, holding onto the wall. He didn’t stop staring, though. His whole interest remained focused on it. “Am I right? Or am I right, mullet?”

“Was the mullet part really necessary?”

He looked over. “Of course.”

“But yeah,” he looked at the sky. “You’re right.”

He jumped on the opportunity, “ah, Mr. Perfect admits I’m right! Or should I say, Mr. I can’t cook or measure brown sugar?”

“Fuck you.”

“I know you want to, but refrain,” he said, causing both of their faces to light up like fireworks.

Lance’s focus went back to the sky. “I can’t wait to become a pilot.”

He spoke with such passion that Keith couldn’t help, but admire. He loved flying, and he absolutely had a knack for it, but there was something missing in it. There was a bit of fire missing in it all.

“Specifically a fighter pilot.”

That surprised him. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. I mean- You’re saving so many people. You’re protecting them.” A sigh escaped his lips. “It’s been my dream since I was younger.”

_ Time _ .  _ Lance’s lifetime had been consistent. His friends. His dreams. _

A little while later, they both fell asleep staring at the night sky. Luckily, the timer on the oven had woken Hunk. Later, he brought up food to them, and Lance wasn’t surprised he knew exactly where they had gone. It had been a good night.

 

~~~

 

Shiro returned for the week. He’d brought his fellow crew member Matt Holt, who lived across the country with his family and went to the other Garrison base. Keith could see Matt’s infatuation with his brother almost immediately, but Shiro remained clueless.

It wasn’t until Lance had his first class with him on Monday when he confronted him. “What’s going on?” 

“What?”

“You’ve been avoiding us  _ all  _ weekend!”

“No, I haven’t.”

Their teachers voice cut them off, “Kogane, McClain, would you like to share something with the class?”

“No, ma’am,” Keith replied quickly.

“Then be quiet.” Frankly, he liked this instructor. She was very blunt with what she expected, and Keith usually respected this.

Lance glared at him from across the table, but said no more.

Keith really didn’t understand why Lance had thought that. He’d only known them for a little more than two weeks, and they didn’t know him all that well.

During passing period, Keith grabbed Lance’s shoulder before he could leave. “I wasn’t avoiding you. My brother is back.”

“You have a brother?”

“Yeah, he works with the Garrison.”

“Well-” he folded his arms, “-you still don’t get to ditch us. Unless we were just going to be your friends for two weeks.”

That was when Keith caught on. “You guys aren’t just some sort of phase. I hope- I really do hope that I can actually be your friend, Lance.”

He rolled his eyes. “Seriously? I thought I already voiced my opinion multiple times.”

“Okay, but my brother is only back for a week, okay?”

His eyes widened. “Oh! That makes a lot more sense. Jesus, you should have just said so. Family is  _ always  _ a first.”

His heart basically melted at Lance’s understanding. “Thank you.”

“Dude,” he said. “We’ve all got families. If  I got to choose to spend my time with them this week. I would do it.” His whole expression was distant. You could just tell that he wasn’t really  _ there _ anymore.

~~~

 

A little over three months later, the results were posted, and Shiro was bound to return soon. Keith continued to spend his time with Lance and Hunk, and Shiro, after hearing all about his newly found friends, had a nice transfer of dorms. One of their roommates had been eager to trade to a studio apartment. 

Lance, Hunk and Keith crowded around the paper. Keith had made it to fighter class. Lance. His name was placed next to the horrifying words:  _ cargo pilot. _

He didn’t seem too upset about it throughout the day, but Keith had caught onto his depressing mood later on. When he had escaped onto the roof later that night, Keith followed. This was his opportunity to speak his mind.

Lance was leaned up over the ledge with perfect posture. “Yes?” He didn’t even turn.

“I-” the long hesitation caused a lump in his throat to build. “I’m so sorry, Lance.”

Lance faced him. “Why the  _ hell _ are you sorry?”

“You wanted to be a fighter pilot-” he covered his face with his hands. “-and I got in the way of that.”

Keith felt arms wrap around him. The embrace was incredibly tight, Lance had no intention of letting go.

“You idiot. I’m not mad at you. It happened for a  _ reason. _ ” He pulled away to look him in the eyes. “It wasn’t your fault. This is your destiny, or whatever.”

“Shouldn’t I be the one comforting you? Not vice versa?”

He shrugged. “You’re just a baby.”

Looking at that boy with pure agony in his expression, but still holding a smile caused a memory to repeat in his head.

_ “You like him, then?” Shiro asked, while fidgiting with something on Keith’s desk. _

_ “Who? Lance?” _

_ “Yes.” Shiro hadn’t met him. Keith had a full intention to introduce him to his new friends, but their schedules wouldn’t line up.  _

_ “Yeah, he’s my friend.” _

_ “I don’t mean that and you know it.” _

_ Shades of color went to his cheeks. “I haven’t known him that long.” _

_ He made a hum of acknowledgement. “Make sure you tell me when you figure out.” _

Keith would have to tell Shiro he figured it out. He licked his lips before saying, “I need to show you something I’ve been working on.”

Lance’s eyebrows raised. 

“It’s across campus, though.”

“We can do it.” He pulled his fist in by his side.

“Well,” his head tilted, “more of off campus.”

He grinned. “I’ve got a plan.”

They dove into trashcans. A red and a blue one. Frankly, Keith had never realized how color coated the campus actually was. That was how they escaped off campus, though. Keith had never felt more foolish, but at least he was with  _ him. _

There was a small cave just below the plateu the campus had been placed on. Keith led him inside.

“I don’t mean to bother you, but this is like… Super creepy. Emo as hell.”

He glared at him, but Lance didn’t really seem to care. Keith pulled out a flashlight, and showed the bike.

“What the-”

“My brother and I worked on it the last week he was here.”

“A bike? Like a motor one?” He walked up to touch it.

“Well, more of a hoverbike.”

Lance had never moved so fast. He planted his hands on his chest, grabbing his shirt. “You have to take me on a ride!”

“Well, yeah. Otherwise I wouldn’t have brought you down here, genius.” He pushed Lance off of him, blushing at the attention.

He slid onto it, allowing it to roar to life. 

“No helmets? You’ll kill us!”

He snorted. “Just trust me.”

Lance didn’t argue with that, and climbed onto the back. There was barely enough space for both of them. “My brother had me extend the seat, so nearly two people could sit in it.”

“I’m sure two people could fit fine in this, if you weren’t such a hog.”

“Just hold onto me.”

Lance complied, arms wrapped around his waist. With that, they sped off the cliff. Lance was screaming without hesitation. Keith tried to make out his words, but it was just a garbled mess. He tucked his face into Keith’s shoulder, still screaming, but now it was muffled. The soft land was perfect. It caused Lance’s head to come up, hot breath on the side of his head.

“Did you-” heave “-have to do that?”

“Absolutely.” Keith kept going, flying for a long while before they decided to turn back.

Lance snorted, “finally, your stupid mullet is tickling my face.”

“You love it.”

Keith didn’t get a response, but he could picture Lance’s blushing face. 

They eventually made it back to the dorm with many small fights and flirtatious movements. They sat on Keith’s bed. Keith had his own room. Hunk and Lance shared. The apartment was mirrored just the same for their other three roommates. Lance’s hands gripped the sheets. “That was so cool.”

“I hoped you’d say that.”

“It even went all the way off that cliff. Holy hell.”

He hummed, closing his eyes. When Lance didn’t respond, Keith should have known something had happened, but his eyelids wouldn’t budge. He felt the touch of Lance’s lips against his own was gentle. That was when his eyes shot back open, and he watched Lance stand up, exiting his room.

“Goodnight,” he said.

Keith was too flustered to respond, touching his fingers back up to his lips.

 

~~~

 

_ I should have known. I should have known my life would mess up _ . He looked at the screen in the cafeteria. It was a blinking flash with the word MISSING at the top of it. Shiro’s picture, along with two others, one he recognized to be Matt, on it.

He looked over, Hunk and Lance had just received their food. Panic rose in his stomach. They couldn’t see him like this. Tears were already coming to his eyes.

He threw the rest of his food out, fleeing the room. He caught one glimpse of Lance’s shocked expression before he left.  _ Sorry, Lance. I have something to do, and you just can’t get involved.  _

It only took a few moments to run to Iverson’s office. He slammed the door open. “What happened to the Kerberos mission?” He didn’t want his voice to crack while saying it, but it did anyways.

He frowned, looking over. “There was a pilot error.”

He slammed his hand down onto the desk. “Bullshit!”

Iverson would be described as impatient, hotheaded, and did  _ not  _ like being corrected. He stood up. “Now, I’m sorry that you’ve only just heard about this, but Takashi Shirogane  _ was _ at fault. He’s been missing for nearly a month and a half now.”

His anger was only more fueled. “Why wasn’t the public told until now? Why wasn’t  _ I  _ told?”

“Cadet, you will stand down.”

“ _ I will not! _ ” he hissed. “This is my family!”

“CADET KOGANE!” His voice thundered, causing Keith to shudder to a stop. 

Full tears ran down his face. The idea of never seeing Shiro again started to gnaw at him. Nightmares were being fulfilled, but this wasn’t right.  _ It wasn’t Shiro’s fault. _

“Exit my office, and understand that  _ you _ are expendable. Plenty of pilots can take your place.”  _ Why the hell would that even matter? _

Keith basically pushed himself out. He looked up to find Lance. “Were you in trouble with Iverson?”

“Lance-”

“You should have told me! You ran out and you looked haunted!” He pulled him into a hug, but Keith’s first reaction was to push him off.

“It was none of your business, Lance,” he said. He’d never been so bitter to Lance. Even in all of their fights, in all of their remarks. He knew hugging was just Lance and Lance’s way of dealing with things, but Keith couldn’t take it.  _ Not now. _

“Have you been crying?” he tried to reach out and touch his cheek, but Keith grabbed his wrist.

“Stay out of it.”

 

~~~

 

He paced in his room until the middle of the night. “Fuck the Garrison,” he kept repeating under his breath.

_ What actually happened?  _ Keith wasn’t completely sure if he could actually accept that Shiro had messed up. His brother causing the death other people. No one really knowing  _ what  _ went wrong. 

This unsettling feeling was left in the shell of emotion that Keith had left. Yelling at Lance hadn’t helped, and honestly, it made him feel so much worse. 

He pushed his back up against a wall. This was  _ wrong _ . This whole situation was wrong. Keith had to find the truth. Something was pushing him, and he would find it out. He grabbed his knife off of the dresser, and an old bandana. He wrapped it around his face. He had to get to the space operations center.

He  _ had  _ to.

Getting there was the hard part. Though, the second he broke through a window, sirens began to blare throughout the whole campus and work stations.

“Jesus,” he whispered, as people poured in and forced him onto the ground. 

Naturally, as a pilot student, he was forced into Iverson’s office. His head fell back, not looking at the old grumpy man.

“You are going to accept the truth whether you want to or not. Your brother was  _ nothing  _ in the end, but now, you’ll accept it without a place to stay. You are expelled.”

He opened the door to the office. “Fine! Fuck you guys, anyways!”

He went back to the dorm, and was actually escorted, but he sped ahead of them. When he arrived, he let in a deep breath before opening the door. One of the guards looked at him. “Government officials will be here to pick you up tomorrow, and since you don’t have a family, you’re back in the system until you’re eighteen.” Two months.

He didn’t look at the man speaking. He just glared at the door.  _ This is why Shiro wanted you to have friends. So they’d hold you back when you did stupid things.  _

He went in. All of the roommates were gathered in the kitchen, looking wired up.

All of them looked at him, except Lance, who stared forward with distaste. “Keith, what happened?”

“Just let me be,” he said, voice cracking again.

And they did. He went to his room, and began to pack. He looked through it all, and frankly, the only thing he decided to bring was his knife. They let him wander campus the next morning because they thought he wouldn’t jump ship without all of his things, but that was exactly what he did.

He had to leave it behind because this  _ feeling _ was going to help him find the truth about his brother. This didn’t involve Hunk, or Lance. Or the other roommates. He didn’t want their futures to be ruined.  _ Lance should be happy. He’ll be fighter class now.  _ His thoughts remained on Lance as he rode off.

_ I’m so sorry. It just wasn’t my destiny, or whatever. _

 


	2. Lance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Define Love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy reading!  
> Be prepared for switching perspectives.

Lance had thought everything was going fine. Sure, he didn’t get fighter class, but with Keith everything seemed fine. He had enjoyed his time with Keith. It was, in the best words, amazing. He finally had someone in his class that hadn’t rejected his flirting attempts to talk to. He had made friends pretty easily in his classes, but none of them knew. Or even tried to understand him, but when he looked at Keith, it felt okay.

Keith would laugh at his stupid comments during a lecture. Keith would bring a certain leveler to a conversation. Keith would listen. When Keith moved into their apartment, Lance felt extremely vulnerable. All of their roommates knew about Lance’s panic attacks, and bringing Keith into that perspective terrified him, but he was so incredibly accepting within his weak moments.

It didn’t take long for Lance to realize how madly in love he had fallen with Keith. He did have a crush on him previously, but it was more like admiration for he barely knew him. He loved how well he could pilot, how mysterious he seemed about everything. Yet, since he knew he had any sort of feelings for Keith, he had avoided him. It wasn’t until Hunk went up to him when everything changed, when he became his friend.

Yet, Lance must have been wrong. Two nights previous he’d looked at Keith, sitting on his bed, eyes closed. Peaceful. He couldn’t hold back. The boy seemed okay with it. All of their short arguments turned into, what Lance defined as, flirting.

He didn’t know how it got to this. Iverson leaned in close to his face, saying the exact haunting words, “you’ve now been promoted to a fighter class pilot.”

Lance had tried to convince himself that it couldn’t have been Keith that dropped out, but from the night previous, he knew it could have been him.

_Keith tore his hands away from him, nearly yelling about how he needed to stay out of it._

Lance had thought it just wasn’t his day. He prayed that it had just been a bad day, but no. Later that night, the alarms went off, causing everyone to wake up. Keith was gone. He had wandered in aimlessly later, but everyone knew he caused it.

He sat up on the roof of the boy’s dorm. This was where he dealt with his deepest emotions, and unless invited, even Hunk didn’t join him.

He looked off into the sky, a dark shade of purple. Purple. Red and blue.

“I miss you,” he whispered. “I miss you so much. I only knew you for a little bit, but-” he ran his fingers through his hair with an exasperated sigh, “-you were there. You fit so well with me and Hunk, better than anyone has before.”

“I get my team next week, not that you care. They would have been your team. Two other people. Maybe I should have gone into something other than piloting… Then maybe the three of us could have been on a team. No, you- you ran away.”

He stood up, anger rising within him. He clenched his fists. “You ran away!” He felt his temperature rising as he began to pace around the roof. “I still don’t understand, Keith.” Tears were already flowing down his face before he could even figure out what was going on.

He pictured Keith. _“How could you ever think I felt the same way?”_

_“You were such a pitiful sight.” He laughed, throwing his head back._

“Please,” he said, collapsing in front of the figure. “Don’t.” He knew what this would turn into.”

 _“Your pleads have never stopped me before._ ”

His eyebrows knit. He slammed his palms against the ground. “STOP IT!” The concrete caused cuts to run deep into his palms. “Please.” He coughed through the crying. Fully landing on the ground, trying to wipe the water off before it resoaked his face.

He couldn’t even say any more words because the gross sobbing overcame him. He kept pounding on the ground because it was all he could manage. It was the only action he could actually _do._

_If you left because of me… It isn’t right without you. It never was._

 

~~~

 

Lance _hated_ Pidge. He always agreed with Hunk on their little spats. Plus, he was never actually _there._ Hunk invited him over multiple times, but he politely rejected all of his offers. That was also beginning to annoy Lance.

 _Was this how I expected my dream to play out?_ It was his dream, and he knew this, but he couldn’t figure out why he was growing more and more miserable everyday. “ _It’s destiny or whatever._ ” He had told Keith oh so long ago. Hunk had to frequently remind him that it was just school, that it would all be okay.

It had been a little over six months. Lance hoped the image of Keith would be burned from his brain, but either Iverson would say something, or Pidge would say something that reminded him of him. Over the months, on really bad days, he’d go back up to the roof, basically imagining what Keith would say. It usually ended in endless anxiety, and pure sobs, but Lance just couldn’t let go.

Lance held onto his sides, tears filling his eyes. He needed to get to Hunk, but he had to stay late to work on a project.

A small knock was at the door. He opened it to find Pidge. He sat there, wiping his eyes. “Is Hunk here? He told me that we had to do some homework for Codin- Lance are you crying?”

“God no. Not in front of you, gremlin.”

He scowled, “what’s going on?”

Lance shook his head. “What does it matter to you?”

He looked down. “Lance, I’ve gone through some shit, and you may not believe it. But, I’m here if you need someone to confide in-”

“I have Hunk.”

“Other than Hunk.”

He looked at the small figure, eyes wide. _Why was he opening up to me now?_

“I don’t see why I’d need anyone else.”

“Well, you’re crying in a nearly empty apartment. So…”

“Dorm, and _excuse_ you.”

“Lance.”

“Have you eaten dinner?”

He scanned him up and down. “Are you _offering_ me food?”

“I’m asking if my fellow team mate would like to have dinner with me.”

He made a sigh of relief. “I _guess_ I have a little time.”

That was how it started. Lance really needed someone other than Hunk, not to be ungrateful, but Hunk tried his best to be positive. Pidge just gave him it straight.

“So, what has you down?” Pidge said.

He looked up from the pot of boiling pasta.

“Me?” He smirked. “Just some boy problems.”

“Jesus Christ, Lance. Get a life.”

“I mean- He was my friend, and I really cared for him, but if you disappear without saying _anything_.”

He frowned, looking away. His fingers drummed on the counter. “Yeah.”

“I hate him for it, and I wish I understood why he did it. I had to _go through his stuff_ , and it stung. Yet, despite all of my anger-”

“You just want him back.”

Lance rubbed his forehead. “To make everything worse, Iverson is an asshat that thinks it’s fun to rub it in my face. That he’s gone and I can’t even make up for his _piloting_ skills.”

Pidge just listened, arms rest on the table. His expression merely apathetic. “So, were you dating, then?”

“Hell if I know.”

“It’s complicated.” He mimicked a high pitched bitch voice.

Lance laughed, “you don’t even know, kid.”

“Don’t call me kid.” He lifted his head and pointed at him with a nearby fork.

Lance snorted.

“Can you tell me about him?”

He was surprised at the request, but he happily provided. “He had a mullet, and he always wore leather gloves. He was secretly _making_ a hoverbike under the Garrison’s nose.” Pidge grinned at that. “He gave me a ride once. It was awesome. When he was placed in fighter class, I wasn’t even that upset. Sure, it was my dream,” he poured the pasta into a colander, watching the steam rise above his head. He measured out some milk, cheese, and other various items. “With him, things started to fit into place.” He poured all of it into a sauce pan. “He challenged me to be better. I did next to everything to impress him.”

Pidge’s eyes widened at the smell once it started to heat up.

“And now, he’s everywhere, and my dream came true. I’m fighter class, but without him- Really him…” He stopped before putting the pasta into the cheesy sauce.

“Hurry up, Lance!”

He nodded back into reality, finishing up the homemade mac and cheese.

He separated them into bowls. Three because Hunk would be heading back by now.

Pidge shoveled it into his face, nearly groaning at the taste. “This is _amazing_.” Their gratitude was shown through his glasses.

“Amazing?” It really wasn’t. All of his ingredients had been extremely stale.

He had watched Pidge before. Their quick behavior was masking the fact that they were always shaking. He entertained the idea that Pidge didn’t eat a lot of food. “Hey, help yourself to some more when you’re done.”

He licked his bowl clean when Lance finally had his first bite.

He touched his stomach with a short smile. “Thank you.”

“I’m a master chef, Pidge, and you would know this if you came over more often!”

He smiled, with the small curl of his lip, but then his expression grew serious. “Something I was told all my life was that home wasn’t a place, it was the people you love the most, and maybe it applies to dreams. I mean, it shifted because…”

“It wouldn’t be complete without him.” He put his head into his hands, knowing how red his cheeks were.

“Lance?”

“Hm?”

“I prefer gender neutral pronouns. Do you mind-”

“Of course not! They and them it is,” he patted his- their back. _That was the most humane thing they’ve ever said like a real fourteen year old._ “And, maybe I don’t hate you as much as I thought.”

“What?”

 

~~~

 

He had to convince Hunk, and after two hours of coercing him, he finally got him to agree, though he protested the whole way there.

Pidge snuck out of his dorm, causing a whole different suspicion to flutter within him. _Where have they been going_?

When they got to the roof, Pidge was perfectly civil with them. Other than Hunk touching their stuff, which was a valid concern. _Scientists_ .The alien talk was what bewildered Lance the most. _Isn’t that just supernatural obsession?_

Hunk was voicing everything that everyone was thinking as they ran down the mountain where the spaceship landed. Pidge was right. That wasn’t one of the Garrison’s.

Shiro was in there. Basically Lance’s role model. Hunk, of course, had to be the annoying voice of reason, but luckily, he was out voted.

When the explosion happened, Lance jolted upright. He could feel this overwhelming sensation. He took the binoculars from Pidge again, and he wasn’t sure _what_ emotion created in himself.

“It’s Keith!” Lance jumped down.

“Are you sure?” Hunk followed behind.

“I’d know that mullet _anywhere_ .” His voice came out bitter, which he had an entire right to be. I mean sure, he made progress on how he felt about Keith, but he didn’t _know_ what he went through. He wasn’t  there to see that struggle and _pain_ that _he_ put himself through.

He wasted no time, barging into the structure. “Nope! No you don’t!” He rose a finger, pointing at the face. _I’m taller than him now_. “I’m saving Shiro!”

His expression was unreadable, as always. “Lance?”

He clicked his tongue, taking Shiro’s other side. “So you remember me, huh? What a surprise?”

Keith frowned. “We were-”

“Rivals.” Lance said. “Just rivals. Lance and Keith- Neck and neck.”

Keith’s eyebrows knit. “What’s going on?”

“Come on, Hunk and Pidge are outside.”

“You got _Hunk_ into this mess?” They started to drag him out.

“You don’t get a say in what we do anymore, dropout.”

He scowled, clearly unamused at the nickname. “Still using your best friend, huh, cargo pilot?”

 _How fucking dare he?_ Lance was ready to lunge at him, and if it weren’t for Shiro, he probably would have.

They put Shiro on the hoverbike. Lance climbed on and Hunk asked, “hey, mind if we catch a ride with you?”

Pidge, Hunk and Lance climbed onto the back for there wasn’t enough room in the seat. It didn’t even fit Shiro. “Why am I holding this guy?”

Lance looked back at the following trucks. “Can’t this thing go any faster?” They were catching up and that made Lance horrified on a number of levels.

“If we throw off some extra weight.” Keith merely hissed back.

Hunk’s eyes widened, catching on quickly. “Whoa man-”

Lance didn’t though, further embarrassing himself. “Oh!” _Why did Keith_ always _have good ideas?_ “Right!” He glanced around, soon to be reminded there were only people on the bike. “Okay, that was meant as an insult.”

They approached a cliff, and Lance remembered holding tightly around Keith’s waist. _Now is not the time to think of that_.

“Shit!” Pidge cussed, clearly seeing the situation.

“There’s too much weight on this! We’ll all die, Keith!” When they didn’t slow down, Lance had to scream, “are you trying to get us killed!?”

Keith made the simple reply as they went off. “Shut up and trust me!”

The trucks stopped, and Lance couldn’t settle that bit of pride and smugness in his throat. _I’m probably expelled,_ he thought. _I guess I’m a dropout, too._

The air cushioned their fall, and they accelerated once again. Lance didn’t even realize his back was against Keith’s, taking his place to hold Shiro. _Why you?_ The question pounded in his head. _It still isn’t the fucking time._

They flew through the night, and arrived at a shack at the crack of dawn. A small shack in the center of the desert.

“So much for team bonding, _Lance_.” Hunk stumbled off of the bike.

Keith smirked.

Lance glared at Hunk. “What? This happened _exactly_ how I planned!”

Pidge frowned, glancing between them.

“Of course it did.”

Lance helped Keith bring Shiro, who was semi conscious right now.

Keith looked him in the eye. “Lance.” He pinpointed the feeling. _Guilt_.

“Don’t talk to me.” He said, leaving Shiro on the couch. “I don’t want you to be _anywhere_ near me.” His heart began to pick up pace as Keith reached for his hand.

Lance pulled away before he could do it. “You are an asshole.”

“God, Lance. You’re the one who won’t hear me out.”

“You missed your chance to explain it.”

“What?”

“Maybe before you disappeared!”

Their eyes locked again. _Greyish purple. Why are his eyes perfection?_

“Fine. You do this, but you can’t say I didn’t try.”

He rolled his eyes, exiting the shack to see Pidge and Hunk who were unloading Pidge’s stuff from his pack.

“This is stupid.”

“I thought it went exactly how you planned.”

Lance looked at Hunk in dismay. “I don’t need your sass.”

Hunk frowned. “Troubles with Keith?”

“Who even is that guy?” Pidge piped in.

“I have a story for you.” Hunk grinned, and he groaned, catching on.

 

~~~

Keith:

When they made it to the Castle of Lions, jealousy kept rolling back over Keith. _I don’t care if he flirts with Allura. I mean, why would it matter?_

She put him on the ground, though, and Keith couldn’t help but smirk at that.

He hadn’t gotten a moment alone with Hunk yet, which is something he wasn’t really looking forward to. Hunk was the most welcoming of people, but forgiving? Keith didn’t really know. Lance clearly had been building resentment since the beginning.

What he didn’t know though, was that Keith had been replaying the moment he felt Lance kiss him in the desert a million times. He would never know how that was the thing that kept him sane. He would never know about how angry he was at the fact that he’d never see Lance again, but looking at him now, the empty screaming inside of him remained silent. _I missed you, you stupid stupid idiot!_

When he finally found the red lion, a rush of energy flowed through him, and it felt so natural. He knew exactly how to pilot it, and he was ready. It had been different in the caves. He couldn't stop thinking about Lance. When he was there, he wondered if maybe he did fall in love with Lance, but now knowing that Blue was Lance’s lion, he rejected the idea.

Forming Voltron was a new type of scary. He could feel each of his team mates, their feelings kept rushing through him. There was fear seeping in from each of the paladins, but determination came from Shiro and Lance. _I wish I had your confidence_.

Training was in all words: awful. Keith was _sick_ of being paired with Lance. He walked up to his brother half way through, basically begging to get out of it. Shiro only showed amusement.

“It is time to face the Gladiator!” Allura said.

They were forced into the damn training room, and without any direction. A figure dropped from the sky, and immediately went for Lance who was shooting with his bayar. _Dumbass_.

When they finally sat down for food, Lance surprisingly had chosen a spot next to him. When their hands were clasped together by the cuffs, he immediately regretted it, Keith guessed. Their struggle seemed to bother Allura, but she was the one who had _caused_ this.

“You can’t treat us like some prisoners like- like-” he stumbled. Usually when he was this angry, he lost his train of thought.

Lance must’ve remembered this and stepped in, like he had at the Garrison. “Like a bunch of toy prisoners!”

It may have been silly, but Keith had always appreciated that. “Yes! Thank you, _Lance_ !” He couldn’t help the ache within himself. _Why can’t it always be like this? Because you fucked up, Keith._

When the fight broke out, it felt natural, too. Being by Lance was so perfect, and Pidge and him had great symmetry on their throws. _Maybe the universe isn’t completely hopeless._

Things had seemed to be getting better, but Lance still had yet to open up to him, or to even make an effort to talk to him. The Arusians were at the Castle for some stupid ball thing, and Lance had been just chatting with him before watching the performance. He seemed miffed by their chant at the end.

“I say Vol, you say Tron. Ready? Vol!” He threw his hand out.

He looked at the boy, not wanting to admit that he hadn’t heard a word that Lance just said. “Uh… Voltron?” He tried guessing his next word.

“No.. No..” He frowned. “I say Vol, you say…?”

“Um… Voltron?”

He went to sip his drink. “We’ll work on it.” Keith noticed how Lance hadn’t brought himself to actually drink the substance previously, which he didn’t blame him for. Soon enough, he found out it wasn’t good at all.

While Keith enjoyed the party, these things weren’t in his complete comfort zone. He spent most of his time with Hunk after that. He searched for Lance, but no sign. _He couldn’t have gotten lost in the crowd unless he was lying down._

When the explosion went off, Keith felt his heart skip a beat. When he saw Lance on the floor, he nearly broke down. Shiro seemed more stunned than anyone, though. Keith used the Arusian’s distraction. Their village was being attacked. _This would be better than worrying about Lance_.

When he finally understood what had happened in the middle of the heated fire, he just about left the princess at the sight. _He’s in there_ . He ran across the bridge, watching the barrier fall. _You needed to be faster_.

He screamed, pounding against it. Memories of Lance’s laugh just poured through his head, despite Keith’s preloaded pain. “Please, no.” When Pidge’s voice came through, he still wasn’t certain that this was going to work, but god help them if it didn’t.

He felt helpless on the outside. Sitting. Waiting. “Keith, we’ll make it back in.”

He looked at the princess. Sure, she was beautiful and Keith saw why Lance would pine after her, but he couldn’t help but hold a bitter resentment over her about it. “I hope so.”

“Don’t underestimate them.”

“They’re just a kid, Allura. I couldn’t even do what their doing?”

“You seem to think quite high of yourself, but each paladin has strengths and weaknesses. This is where Pidge thrives. You have to let them do it.”

“Lance has no strengths.”

“You don’t really believe that.”

He looked over at her. Her gaze was particular, saying one message. _She knew_. “How-”

“It isn’t very hard to see your, how you humans would say, chemistry.”

He shook his head. “No. There's none between him and me.” ‘

She was unconvinced. “You two will get over this blockade. Red and Blue surround each other. You may seem like opposites, but in reality, you have more similarities than you’d think.”

He looked down. _I hope so, but I don’t even know if we’ll get that chance._

“He’ll be fine.”

_Why does she have to be fucking perfect? How do I even compete with that?_

After more instructions towards Pidge, they didn’t go back to that conversation. There was hell going through the coms. His brother was being tortured somewhere in there. _Why did I have to be so stupid?_ Everyone was in danger now because Keith ran away too soon because he didn’t want to face an injured Lance.

He kept banging on the field. “Just let me-” He rammed through, basically tripping. “In.”

“They did it!” Allura clasped her hands together.

Keith didn’t take any time to celebrate. He bolted off. They had set up where the crystal had been, similar to a secondary control room.

He heard the shot, and Pidge came up to cut off Sendek’s arm. Pidge swung down, with nearly perfect grace, slicing his arm off.

Keith jumped in, ready to kick some ass. He slammed into his chest, slicing his bayar across his armor. He fell back, defeated.

He took the opportunity to take care of Lance. He took his hand, kneeling down next to him.

His eyes were only half way open, but he held a faint smile. “”We did it.” His voice was so hoarse. He didn’t want to imagine his pain, but he did. _You didn’t deserve this._ “We are a good team.”

Keith wasn’t entirely sure if he meant them two or all of the paladins, but either way, it didn’t matter. He just returned the smile. He leaned in closer to him, feeling his heat through the gloves. _It felt right_.

“Shiro!” Hunk ran in. “We have the crystal.”

Allura pointed at Keith. “Get him to the healing pod.”

Luckily, he wasn’t completely unconscious, but he leaned all of his weight on him. Keith held him up still, letting Lance take small steps.

“I never apologized.”

Lance made a low grumble.

“I really need to, Lance.”

There was no response. They remained in silence until they made it to the medical bay.

“Now isn’t the time,” he said as the power rose up through the room. Keith had to dress him in the weird outfit, neither of them said anything of it.

He looked at the boy in his arms, and slowly put him into the pod. “You’ll be okay, Lance.”

He made a slow nod.

“You’ll be okay so that I can properly apologize to you.”

There was a seal on the container, Lance’s eyes remained closed, almost like a dead body

“Hey,” Shiro strolled his way in.

“Are you okay?” Keith said, walking up to inspect his brother’s injuries.

“Yeah. That was a bit of a scare, though, huh?”

“You have no idea.” He instinctively looked at the pod.

“So, that’s Lance.”

He let out a long breath. “Yeah. That’s him.”

He put an arm around Keith, basically laughing. “So, did you ever figure out an answer?”

“Yeah. It’s a yes.”

“I figured.”  
“We’ll find Matt, too.”

Shiro ran a hand through his tuft of hair. “I know.” He glanced at him. “He likes you, too, you know.”

“He used to. Not anymore.”

“Oh no. Did my baby brother do something bad?” They wandered back up to the sitting room.

“Well,he kissed me. The next day I kind of ran away.”

He snorted, slamming down onto the space couch.

“Now he _hates me_ ”

“No, he’s just bitter. If he hated you, we’d never form Voltron.”

He was right, of course, bt Keith wasn’t entirely convinced of this. There was no real way to be certain. Rest his head into his hands. “I let him get to me. He had a total right to be mad, but I just made everything worse.”

“No, he’s being an ass.”

“Language!” Keith said with sarcasm implanted into his voice.

“He doesn’t have a right to treat you that way, but it doesn’t mean you can be just as bad back. The first thing you need to do is go to him and apologize for your first mistake.” He shrugged. “It may be a few days, but you should go to Hunk in the meantime.”

He never went to Hunk either. He should’ve hit himself. _Of course._

 

Hunk never left Lance’s side. Shiro was right, it would be exactly two days before Lance would get out of the pod. Keith approached him there.

“Hey.”

“Hey.” He glanced up from where he was staring at the floor.

“You look awful. Go get some sleep.”

“I can sleep when I’m dead.”

“Okay, then, Pidge.” He rolled his eyes.

Hunk grinned at that. “That is something they’d say, huh?”

“Most definitely.”

Keith sighed. It was time to clean up the mess he made.”I never got to talk to you about me leaving.” He rubbed his temples. “It wasn’t fair to you or Lance and I’m so sorry for just disappearing.”

“It wasn’t that you left, really. I mean, man, you should’ve depended on us. I still don’t know why you left. You just disappeared and Lance convinced himself that it was his fault because of the- ah well- but it wasn’t fair that you didn’t even _tell_ us what happened after you got expelled.”

Keith looked down. _I guess I could have told them_. “I found out that the Kerberos mission failed.”

“What?”

He explained about Shiro and that he _knew_ it was a fake.

“Shiro’s your brother?”

“Oh my god.”

“Oh my god,” Hunk nodded. “That makes a lot more sense!” He laughed. “Oh god, this is great! You’re like a family!”

“So, do you forgive me?”

He pulled him into a hug, “of course I do!” Then he pulled back. “Yet, I’ll always stand by Lance if you two fight. So, you’d better get that resolved.”

“I will.”

~~~

 

Lance:

He took a few steps. _Why was everything so cold?_

He heard long ticks. He looked over Hunk’s shoulder. They were timing something. With two clocks. “Are we having a clock party?”

“Lance! You ruined it!” Hunk shot him a glare. His eyes widened. “LANCE!”

Allura spoke for a moment, but Lance kind of blocked out her words, glancing at Keith who seemed genuinely concerned. _Yeah, you be concerned._

“Talking? Food? Are you asking me on a date?”

Keith’s eyes sunk into a glare, and Lance couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt. _Is there any chance he_ did _have feelings for me_? He thought of him leaning in just before Hunk came running in. The purple tint on his face. It was perfect. Adorable, even. He kept trying to explain himself, but Lance knew he didn’t have the energy to process it.

They gathered in the dining room, even the mice, who seemed to appreciate the small nibblets of food he had been feeding them on a spoon. Space goo wasn’t his favorite type of food anyway.

“Thanks everybody!” _Wow, they really did do a lot for me_ . He pointed at Keith, ready to pick another fight. He knew he wanted to apologize, but Lance wanted to make it hard for him. He deserves a struggle. _He’ll get the worst of me, and then he can decide if he really wants me_. “Sounds like the mice did more than you, though.”

“I punched Sendek!”

“After I shot his arm off.” His eyes rolled.

“We had a bonding moment!” His voice cracked from the angst. “I cradled you in my arms!”

“Nope,” he said. “Don’t remember. Didn’t happen.” He turned his head up away from him. He nearly felt bad, but even Shiro seemed to be amused by this. Frankly, Lance just didn’t want Keith to feel obligated to apologize. He had to do it on his own will.

He glared and looked away.

Pidge confessed to the whole team not too much later about _technically_ being female, but preferring gender neutral pronouns. Lance grinned, actually happy to know something about this.

“The castle’s a ship?” He coughed into his sleeve. “How long have I been out?”

Keith smiled at that, walking back out of the room. Probably to train. The ache in Lance’s chest remained, though. _I really miss that._

Hunk seemed to have quite an infatuation with this girl. _Shay_ . He wouldn’t stop saying her name, and the only one who seemed rather interested was Coran, who already _knew_ her.

“He’s just excited to see his new _girlfirend_.” Pidge taunted.

Lance turned ready for some Garrison trio interaction. He’d been waiting for them to bring that up.

He put up his hands in defense. “She’s not my girlfriend, just a rock that I met and I admire very much.”

Lance really hoped that she would be as great as Hunk made her sound.

“There’s an incoming distress signal!” Allura interrupted their banter.

All head turned that way. “What about the Balmera and _Shay_?” Hunk’s eyes widened,  pleading.

“This could be a life or death situation.” Shiro tried.

“Shay’s life is in danger because of me! She sacrificed herself! We have to help her first! Whoever it is can _wait!_ ”

“We’ll make a quick stop and then head straight there.”

Lance tried making this a lighter situation, but he had never seen his friend so desperate to run into a very dangerous situation. Lance wished he had found that strong of motivation. Sure, protecting Earth was a priority to him, but anyone could take his place. He wondered why _he_ had to do that all too often.

He looked up to see Keith looking away. _No, please stare at me,_ he pleaded on the inside.

They landed on a specific planet with all sorts of color schemes. There was a beautiful alien who introduced herself as Nyma.

“Don’t mess this up.” Keith said, clearly knowing his intentions.

He scowled at him then turned back to Nyma who was giggling. “Don’t listen to him. He’s an asshole.”

His eyes just rolled. He got into a conversation on the other side of their camp, just keeping an eye on Keith.

He was chatting with Rolo, and he was _smiling_ . He was _enjoying_ this. Lance felt bitterness rising within him. He looked back at Nyma, and he didn’t really care. He just wanted to make Keith jealous.

Hunk had been warning him that they couldn’t be trusted, but how bad could they be? They weren’t part of the empire.

Lance snuck her onto the ship, making sure Keith could see. He sat there, shaking his head.

Sure, he had fun with Nyma, flying over the planet. She was absolutely brilliant actually. For a second, he actually believed that he should move on from Keith. This game was drawing on for a really long time. When he was at the Garrison, he convinced himself that no one would want him. Nyma was proving that wrong.

“Give me your hand.”

He smiled, placing it in her yellowish palm, much larger than his. She swung it down onto the formation and it tied his wrists around it. The thoughts that poured into his mind made him flush. “This is- ah-” _Fucking aliens. Why would they know what’s normal?_

Lance watched his lion rise up, and the words, “ah, quiznak,” escaped from his mouth.

He sat there, in a position that would destroy his back, waiting for his team to get his lion back. He could already picture Shiro’s dad speech. “You may not trust Hunk’s complete judgement, but you can still do him the respect of following a rule we _all_ agree on.”

“Hey Lance. I got your lion back.” Keith.

“Thank you, Keith. Now, can you come and unchain me?”

There was a pause. “What was that? You’re cutting out.” It was obvious enough that he really wasn’t, but this was how he wanted to play it.

Lance called to him over the coms, no doubt he was listening on the other end with amusement.

Eventually, Shiro cut in making him go back for Lance. Keith accused him of being unfair. There was a separate conversation going on, but he didn’t have the context, so he tuned it out.

After who knows long, Red landed down. Keith strolled out with ease, watching the pitiful sight of him. He had a short smirk. He took off his helmet, probably turning off the coms so that the others wouldn’t listen in.

“Look what you got yourself into.”

“I know.”

“Good.” He unclasped that cuffs. “Come on.”

He stood, stretching out his back. “What? That’s it?”

He looked over, sighing “Yeah. That’s it.” There wasn’t hostility, but the mere moment of teasing was almost like they were friends again. Lance embarrassing himself and Keith gloating about how dumb he was. He followed Keith into his lion, desperately wanting to reach out to him.

 

They finally arrived on the Balmera. He was assigned with Keith, by Shiro, despite both of their complaints. They would sneak in after blowing up some of the signals. Keith’s discovery of firepower was an immediate response to have Lance show his own ice power.

They were in the caves, and Lance brought up his brilliant suggestion. “And then they’re trapped.”

He looked at each of his features, carefully sending his gaze over his cheekbones and eyelashes. He remembered being so close to them that night. What he would do to get that close again…

Was he still even mad at him? He had already made his life a living hell. He seemed hurt enough by Lance and what he did. _No, I’m not._ He just really wanted to hear how guilty he felt about hurting him. He wanted to hear about how Keith messed up and Lance wasn’t the one who ruined their friendship.

 

Keith:

After the battle with the giant squid thing, he went back inside. He didn’t want to face Hunk or Lance. Allura seemed to be perfectly content in Lance and Shay’s arms.

He kept training. Shiro was busy extracting Sendek’s memories to get involved with his brother’s negative emotions.

Panic rose through him when the simulator wouldn’t close. He closed the doors behind him, but the fighter escaped, slashing at him, causing him to keep walking backwards as he fought it.

“HELLLLLLPPPPPP!” He turned just a little further.

“What are you doing!?” He saw Lance. _Again_ , in a bad situation.

“If you don’t let me out right now I’ll be sucked into space!” He kept pounding.

When the doors opened and released the bad simulator, he helped lift Lance in, surprised in how hard it actually was.

“What were you doing in there!”

“I thought Coran-” He heaved. Even breath. In and out. “Who was that guy?!”

“He was trying to kill me!”

“Well, was it the castle? ‘Cause that’s who’s trying to kill me!”

They bolted off screaming. He entertained the thought about how Lance had sacrificed himself to save Coran two times. Although the second time was faulty, he does it without question. _Would he do that for me_? He hoped not. He wasn’t worth that.

Just before he went back to find Coran, Keith reached for his wrist.

“Please,” god, it basically hurt to say. “Please don’t do that.”

His eyes wide. “What?”

“You keep endangering yourself!” His grip on his wrist lowered to his hand, entangling his fingers with his own.

“I thought _Coran_ was in there.”

“It doesn’t matter. I can’t- We can’t lose you to that. Just, you do it without thinking. That’s-” he takes in a deep breath, accepting his emotions. “That’s terrifying.”

“What is?”

“The idea of knowing you’re gone, Lance.”

He looked away. “I guess you understand now.”

“I do.”

“I have a right to yell at you!”

Keith maintained his gaze. “A perfect right.”

“Not only that Keith, but I thought it was _my_ fault! I blamed myself! Okay?” He clenched his hand, and Keith offered up the other one, and soon enough they were holding both of each other’s hands. “I didn’t even know if you were okay.”

“I know.”

“I never even got the option to forget you because you were _always_ there. The better pilot. The one who would have done better than me. _God,_ Keith.” His weight pressed into Keith. His head rest on his shoulder. “I hated that I missed you, but as much as I tried to convince myself, I never hated you.”

He wrapped his arms around Lance, letting him lie limp in his arms. “I know.” His voice cracked. “I’m so sorry that I put you through that. Please, just let me explain.”

He hummed into his shirt.

“I just- I knew something was wrong with my brother’s disappearance, and I _knew_ I’d probably get booted from the Garrison, but I thought it’d just be better if I just left, and you didn’t get involved.”

His head lifted, chin still on his shoulder, now wrapping his own arms around Keith. “It was my choice to make, you stupid boy.”

 _You’re a pretty stupid boy, too._ “But- You’d be fighter class, and that was your dream.”

He pulled away, probably making the most romantic move that would ever be made on Keith. His thumb lined the edge of his jaw line. “Oh, my dream wouldn’t ever be complete without you in it.”

There was a long silence, but it was broken with Lance saying, “and I guess I have to apologize for being an asshole about the whole thing.”

He smirked. “I’ll accept that.” He leaned in, pressing his lips against the other boy’s. “I never got to return this to you.”

He felt Lance basically melt in his arms.

 

The amount of physical attention Lance demanded was a lot more than Keith expected. Shiro was extremely skeptical because of Keith despising it as a child. Though, he was surprisingly willing. Having Lance lay over his lap or set his head on top of Keith’s or _constant_ hand holding was so easy and natural. He’d gotten used to the warmth of Lance being around him.

Once they had fallen asleep, draped over each other, on the couches in one of the resting areas and Shiro walked in. “What _exactly_ are you doing with my brother, Lance?”

Keith nearly choked, waking up so fast to the sound of his voice.

Lance seemed to die inside. “ _Brother_?”

Keith glanced carefully at him. “Uh- Yeah..” _How could I have forgotten?_ “I didn’t tell you?”

He winced when Lance’s head shook vigorously.

“Oh my god.” Pidge and Hunk both walked in. “I guess he found out, huh?”

“How did you guys _not_ know?” Keith asked.

“You,” Lance pointed at him, “my _boyfriend_ , didn’t even _tell_ me. So, like- What?”

Keith turned bright red, grinning. “Yeah,” he swallowed, “I guess I could’ve told you.”

“You’re a dork,” Shiro smacked him from behind the head.

Hunk shifted himself in between Keith and Lance. “This is so great, the three of us again, but with more people.” He wrapped an arm around each of them. “Like brothers, man.”

Lance snorted, “please don’t refer to all of us as brothers. I mean, I am dating one of them.” He blew a light kiss across Hunk to Keith.

This caused a chain reaction of Keith blushing even more, eventually covering his face with his hands. _He’s lucky he’s cute,_ he thought, despite knowing that he’d fall in love with him even if he was ugly as fuck.

Lance and Pidge cackled laughter. Soon enough, they had shifted their position to where Hunk and Pidge were on the left edge, Shiro on the right. Lance was laying on Keith’s lap in the center of the circular couch.

Keith considered himself lucky, though. I mean, in the middle of the hellfire that was sent upon them, he found one of the greatest, most annoying, person in his life. He knew that these moments would be the best ones because of the constant war and battles they were forced into.

He never thought he could accurately define love. Yet, looking down at the boy that smiled at him on his lap, he knew one word that could perfectly describe it.

 _Lance_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally finished! Thank the heavens for school breaks where I can stay up and write fics, yeah? 
> 
> Thank you all for reading and responding! It's been nice reading your comments, and I can't believe I actually finished something!
> 
> <3 <3 <3


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